Wednesday, March 19, 2008

The Pain Cave

Several of the Kidlets saw Coach Jesse this evening for a trip to the Pain Cave.


TK got to learn the ins and outs of a lactate test, Staz and El Gigante completed this season's second round of Conconi's, and AWfoSho simply succumbed to the calipers for a skinfold measurement in an attempt to avoid injury follow the clavicle escapade.


But, before we can discuss the blood, sweat, and tears, an explanation of exactly what the Pain Cave is...


E.O.B. may have encapsulated this best in a recent email:


This "pain cave" is a Midwestern Collegiate Cycling Conference euphemism with which Phil Mooney has infected both the the Aggie and Elite teams. Degrees of hurt are as follows:
"I'm in the pain cave;"
"I'm in the pain cave and I'm bobbling my flashlight;"
"I'm in the pain cave and I dropped my flashlight;"
The inverse is also true--if you're feeling especially strong, you proclaim that you brought extra batteries to the pain cave.

Two bits of humor this vernacular has engendered in the last 7 days:
While attempting ANT2 repeats on Cardiac last week with Phil, Nils, and Paul Mach, I was going as hard as I could up the damn hill when Paul passed me like I was standing still. He offered some quick words of encouragement, but all I could say was "I... uh, dropped... my batteries...down the hole... in the cave."

At the start line of the Men's A Stanford Crit last week, Paul announced, "I brought extra batteries!" Of course none of the Stanford, Cal, SLO, or USC guys had any idea what the hell he was talking about, but Mooney bellowed, "'Cause we're going to the PAIN CAVE!" Current Under-23 national Champion Max Jenkins looked at Mooney in shocked fear, clearly concerned for his safety and Phil's sanity.

Phil also deploys another system of nomenclature built around a mythical town called "Sufferville," but aside from its utter lack of bathrooms, I know nothing of the place.


The kidlets definitely visited the Pain Cave this evening... there was sweat, lots of it, all over Jesse's hard wood floors. There was blood pumping through teenage veins and dripping out of TK's ear each time he was pricked. And, AWfoSho will never admit to this, there were tears as Jesse pinched him with the skinfoldometerthingamabob... those things leave marks.


Gotta wait for Jesse's analysis of all the data, but the initial numbers look good... up from the last trip to Jesse's Cave of Pain. for those of you that are old enough to remember... the Cave of Pain is definitely an E-ticket ride!!!

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